Inspiration from Steve Jobs

I found this article as I was looking through my Facebook feed, and was shocked to find this is the first time I read it. As we all know too well, life is short. Life is worth living and we all need to stop and smell the roses while we are here to enjoy them. 

Read on for some inspiration from one of the most treasured men in the history of technology. We know him as a symbol of success, though he says he has little joy.  Read on for the last words of Steve Jobs:

"I have come to the pinnacle of success in business.In the eyes of others, my life has been the symbol of success.However, apart from work, I have little joy. Finally, my wealth is simply a fact to which I am accustomed. 

At this time, lying on the hospital bed and remembering all my life, I realize that all the accolades and riches of which I was once so proud, have become insignificant with my imminent death. 

In the dark, when I look at green lights, of the equipment for artificial respiration and feel the buzz of their mechanical sounds, I can feel the breath of my approaching death looming over me. 

Only now do I understand that once you accumulate enough money for the rest of your life, you have to pursue objectives that are not related to wealth. 

It should be something more important:For example, stories of love, art, dreams of my childhood.No, stop pursuing wealth, it can only make a person into a twisted being, just like me. 

God has made us one way, we can feel the love in the heart of each of us, and not illusions built by fame or money, like I made in my life, I cannot take them with me. 

I can only take with me the memories that were strengthened by love.This is the true wealth that will follow you; will accompany you, he will give strength and light to go ahead. 

Love can travel thousands of miles and so life has no limits. Move to where you want to go. Strive to reach the goals you want to achieve. Everything is in your heart and in your hands. 

What is the world's most expensive bed? The hospital bed.
You, if you have money, you can hire someone to drive your car, but you cannot hire someone to take your illness that is killing you.
Material things lost can be found. But one thing you can never find when you lose: life. 

Whatever stage of life where we are right now, at the end we will have to face the day when the curtain falls. 

Please treasure your family love, love for your spouse, love for your friends...Treat everyone well and stay friendly with your neighbours."

Holiday Gifts for Ladies Fighting Pretty

When someone you love is battling cancer, we know, you want to help. You want to save them from this cancer journey and help them feel strong, beautiful and loved! Have you ordered them a Pretty Package yet? If not, click here and do it now! 

If you already have...now what? Well, here are some really great gift ideas for the ladies in your life who are Fighting Pretty!

Find these items at the following sites:
AnaOno Intimates
Victoria's Secret
Sock Dreams
SuperLoveTees
Zazzle
Etsy / Fighting Pretty

Have any other great ideas? Share with us! Happy Shopping! 

So this is Christmas, for weak & for strong!

So this is Christmas | And what have you done?

Another year over. 

A new one just begun.

So this is Christmas | I hope you have fun.

Near and the dear ones. 

Old and the young....

...Let's hope it's a good one...without any fear.

So this is Christmas | For weak and for strong. 

For rich and poor ones. The world is so wrong. 

So happy Christmas | For black and for white.

For yellow and red ones. 

Let's stop all the fight.

War is over, if you want it.

Every year around this time, I write a similar blog post because I can't help but have old feelings about this time of year. In 2008, I was living in New York City - the most wonderful place during this time of year. Lights were twinkling in the huge Macy's Department Store in Herald Square around dusk when I got the call at the office that I - me - 26-year-old Kara - was diagnosed with breast cancer. My new office crush, Nate Dolce, had asked me out all week long and I was looking forward to our first real Friday night date with him! But instead, I was crying in a cab on the phone with my mom on my way home from work.

That's when December became the best / worst month of the year. In 2008, I was scared. I was mad. I was afraid. But... I was newly in love. And somehow, everything around me sparkled.

I remember hearing Sarah's McLaughlin's version of "Happy Xmas" and sitting in my apartment with a (huge) glass of wine and tears running down my cheeks. Knowing that 2009 - the year ahead - would be a year of cancer, this song became so full of hope for me. I kept thinking, next year at this time, in December of 2009, I will be able to look back and listen to this song and think "What have I done? I beat cancer! Another year over. A new one just begun. Thank God! So this is Christmas...for weak and for strong! I am strong, I am amazing! 

And now at 7 years since diagnosis (YEY!), I am happy to say "War is OVER! And let's hope for a good year...without any fear!" 

As we approach the holiday season, and 2016, I wish you all the best for many years to come. Stay strong, don't ever give up and keep on Fighting Pretty ladies! Have hope that you too will know that your war is over!

Pucker up with Red Apple Lipstick

We are so excited to announce we will be featuring paraben-free and gluten-free Red Apple Lipstick lip balm in our Pretty Packages for December! As the weather gets cold, keep those lips full of moisture so you can kiss your loved one under the mistletoe this Christmas. Check out founder Kara Dolce and newest member of the Fighting Pretty team, Kelly Delaney trying out the sample color - also included in your December Pretty Package!

So if you haven't ordered a Pretty Package for the lady in your life who is battling cancer, be sure to order one before December 15th so we can get it out in time for Christmas! 

Pink is just a color

Fighting Pretty would like to introduce Alexis ~ a gorgeous MD who has had her share of cancer woes. You may have seen some pretty amazing photos of her in our newsletter, other blog posts or even on Facebook. She is incredible, she is strong, she is beautiful and truly Fighting Pretty! Alexis is a guest blogger of ours who shares her insight on her feelings around October and how we need to remember that pink is just a color.

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I'm not angry.  Though I think most people expect me to be.  However, I will admit: October is a difficult month for me, and what I can only imagine are so many other stage 4 breast cancer survivors.  Pink has taken on an entirely different meaning to me.  Once my favorite color that flooded my wardrobe, baby pink, hot pink, fluorescent pink and all variations are no longer a benign hue in the spectrum of a color I once loved. 

When I was first diagnosed, pink meant sisterhood.  But as I began to see more and more pink: at car washes, ribbons on the sides of soup cans, on the sides of trucks hauling cargo across country, I began to wonder if it was losing its meaning altogether. The "October Walks" feature women infantilized  in pink boas, tutus and pink hair extensions.  Sometimes I feel very frustrated, because it doesn't seem like they are taking this extremely serious disease seriously enough.  And despite all of this awareness, I wonder how women can continue to skip their mammograms yearly? And then I wonder, not only as a survivor but as a physician: are these pink-washed awareness events effective at all?  

I feel like a veteran in this war; having survived with breast cancer for the past two and a half years. Yet its hard to not feel your foundation shattered and your resolve broken at times; having progressed from stage 3 to stage 4, enduring chemotherapy four times, and countless other therapies which failed me.  Yet I am a veteran, a veteran at age 33, but I don't wear a pink uniform. The founding force behind Fighting Pretty, Kara Dolce, once sent an inspirational card to me:  "Accept all that the day brings forth to you as a gift". I keep this on my mantle, it is the first thing I see when I awake every morning, and I'm writing now as an open letter; a call to arms.  To not become hard after life has challenged you the way it has for me.  To not allow cancer to win by destroying your heart, and your hope. When you do wake up, thank God, whatever spiritual entity you believe in, or simply yourself for the moment to live another day.  Stage 4 isn't easy.  Its full of ups and downs, disappointments and small victories.  Please don't think this is a life sentence of misery and solitude.  Work if you can, see friends, spend time with family, take a vacation, make a life move, LET YOURSELF FALL IN LOVE, (and hate the color pink if you want to).  But please, don't be angry.  You are still alive, you still have the capability to to all of these things; cancer cannot take that away from you.  Don't let yourself feel like you're dying. And if you cannot move past that fear: a stage all of us may fall in and out of at times; just remember: As much as death is a part of life, LIFE IS what you are experiencing here and now.  

Pink is just a color. October is a month full of beautiful fall leaves, pumpkins, seasonal beers and coffees, and one of my favorite holidays: Halloween.  Though its hard because it is the month that challenges my strength by forcing me to consistently acknowledge something painful that I am already reminded of daily, I am thankful that it may spark the curiosity of women to perform self breast exams, follow through with their annual cancer screening protocols, and consider the struggle of all survivors.  For me, I try to fill the days with "not-pink-related" events. The days between my scans, chemotherapy and doctors appointments can simply be October days that I share with my loved ones, colleagues and mentors. And of course I always remember: This is a fight, not only a fight against cancer but a fight against the demons that can overcome us and fill us with fear, loss of hope and the feeling that we aren't physically beautiful anymore.  That is not true ladies.  Put on your best lipstick, buy a sexy wig, throw on high heels and take on this disease as the beautiful and fearless fighter you are.  ENJOY the compliments! You deserve them, and when life gives you lemons: don't make lemonade...bake a chocolate cake in heels and leave them all wondering how you did it.    (Footnote: the heels don't have to be pink ;) )

With love, 

Alexis 

Fighting Pretty in the news!

Gosh, it's been a long time since we've written, so first - apologies on that front!
It's not that we haven't been thinking of you, or ways to stay strong and beautiful during this crazy journey called "cancer," it's been that Fighting Pretty is getting some press so we can help even MORE women battling this vicious disease to feel good while doing it!

We've been pretty active on Facebook and Instagram with updating our latest happenings, but ask that you continue to share with your networks all that you love about Fighting Pretty so we can continue to grow. But in recap of the last couple months and even days, we would like to share!

I, Kara Dolce had the pleasure of meeting Pretty Package recipient, Ashley Bell who is currently battling a brain tumor and even writes her own amazing blog, Simply Reasons to Smile. Not only was I wowed by her outer beauty, but Ashley exudes love, strength, style and elegance. Her attitude is light and sweet and you can tell she is just in love with life. Ashley and I were interviewed by KGW and our story was featured in early October. We have become more than acquaintances. Ashley and I have a special bond, and a friendship that will last a lifetime. Check out the segment on KGW!

Ashley Bell with her Pretty Package

I also got the incredible opportunity to visit the Dr. Oz show and speak with Sandra Lee, another amazing breast cancer fighter. Sandra is on a media blitz sharing her story about how she got through the disease. It was such a breath of fresh air to hear Sandra talk about her philosophies and how she made decisions - it was very parallel to my journey and Fighting Pretty! Check out the Dr. Oz segment with Sandra Lee!

Kara Dolce and Sandra Lee on the set of Dr. Oz

Back in August, I was honored to be the Survivor Speaker at the Making Strides Against Breast Cancer breakfast to share my story of how I was "Fighting Pretty" through my journey and how I now serve as a board member for the American Cancer Society and have built an organization to help other women battle this disease with strength and beauty. It was an incredible experience! You can see the speech here. And now, tomorrow 10/10, my friends in Portland, and loving hubby "Nate the Great" will walk along side me at the walk in honor of all those "Fighting Pretty!" (Pics to come!)

So all in all, I wanted to write this note to let you know we are thinking of you, sending you strength and trying our best to get the word out about Fighting Pretty! Check our website for events this month and help spread the word!

Sugarbeets + Fighting Pretty = Love for your Oops Moments

We all know that life throws you unexpected things. Some are heartbreaking and hard to handle, some are manageable but sometimes makes your head spin.

As you know, Fighting Pretty helps women like you and your loved ones feel strong and beautiful during and after cancer treatment. We have been sending “Pretty Packages” full of inspirational items, beauty items and our iconic mini-pink boxing gloves as a reminder to stay strong!

But what we don’t include in our Pretty Packages are the bare essentials you may need as the caretaker. Sometimes staying longer at the doctor’s office than anticipated, getting stuck in traffic on your way to an appointment, or running to work after an appointment may throw you into a small manageable life moment that’s unexpected, but it throws your day completely off.

Sugarbeets, founded by great friend Kristen Mozian, was created for this reason - to help you stay prepared for life’s unexpected moments.  

Kristen and I took a moment to talk more about Sugarbeets and how they can help prepare your for your “oh sugarbeets moments.”

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Kara: What is Sugarbeets?

Kristen: Sugarbeets creates personal care emergency kits for women and men. These kits are packed with day-to-day essential items like tissues, Advil, dental floss, Shout wipes, safety pins, band aids, and a lot more. We have two kits right now: On-the-Go and Essentials. On-the-Go is perfect for the purse and also has a unisex option. Essentials fits great in an office desk or car.

Kara: Where does the name come from?

Kristen: Sugarbeets is inspired by my dad. He taught me that when life throws you unexpected things, to stay prepared..  The name comes from something my dad says. Instead of swearing, he’ll say “oh sugarbeets.” So basically, we cover you in your “oh sugarbeets” moments.

Kara: What’s Sugarbeets mission?

Kristen: The message behind Sugarbeets is straightforward. It’s about being prepared for the small stuff in life so you can be present in the moment and focus on the things that matter most.

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From May 25th to June 6th a portion of your entire Sugarbeets order is going to Fighting Pretty. Shop today and together we can help all women “Fighting Pretty” feel strong and beautiful during and after cancer treatment.

Sometimes the harder you fall, the stronger you rise.

Lauren Clancy.

Obvious beauty. Hidden strength.

Kara Dolce and Lauren Clancy were great friends for many years. They grew up together in a small town in New Jersey, were softball teammates, friends within the same group and always enjoyed make-up, clothes and fashion. The girls drifted after college as some friends do, but one night at a Christmas party in 2012, Kara heard that Lauren had just been diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma – on the same anniversary of Kara’s  breast cancer diagnosis. She was devastated for Lauren.  Though she hadn’t talked to Lauren in quite some time, she immediately needed to reach out. Kara knew what Lauren was up against and wanted to do what she could to be there for her…to inevitably pass on her strength.

That night, Kara contacted Lauren and their friendship immediately rekindled.

There is no denying that Lauren is a natural beauty. In fact, she has even had her hand in modeling. Let’s face it – she’s gorgeous! But for any woman, going through chemotherapy, surgery and the emotional after-effects of cancer, challenges them to feel strong and beautiful during the most trying time of their life. This was no different for Lauren. Her scars made her angry, scared and upset. Her hair loss was a blow to her confidence.

Kara and Lauren would talk weekly – sometimes daily – to remind Lauren she was strong enough to get through this. That there was light at the end of this tunnel and she was going to come out the other end feeling smarter, stronger and even more beautiful than before. She was a warrior! She was a fighter! And she looked gorgeous doing it. She was truly Fighting Pretty.

Lauren pushed through her treatments and with each passing appointment, she felt herself coming back to life. She was growing as a woman, and at our Fighting Pretty photo-shoot, her light shined through. Her hair was just growing back in, and the short pixie hairdo only accentuated her gorgeous face – here you could focus on her natural beauty.  You could look into her eyes and see her inner strength sparkle.

Currently, Lauren got an amazing new job, has recently modeled for Curves The Book by Victoria Janashvili (out this spring), got her own fabulous apartment in Hoboken, NJ and is living life with power in her veins and hope in heart. Lauren fell hard, but she is stronger than ever before. 

Lauren Clancy is Fighting Pretty.

Photo Credit: William Philbin

Fighting Pretty: A How-To Guide

Let's face it. Cancer sucks. There's no way around that, but one thing to do is set your mind to embracing this thing and doing what you can to make yourself feel good. It might be the hardest time of your life, but it's one that will teach you and show you how strong you are, how amazing you are, and how beautiful you are inside and out.

When founder of Fighting Pretty was going through cancer, she wrote a blog, "Loving Kara" after the foundation her family and friends set up to help her get through treatment. Here are some tips on how Kara was Fighting Pretty back in 2009 that are relevant for all women battling cancer:

One thing Kara did for every chemo appointment was get dressed for treatments as if she were going to work. Whether she'd wear her favorite heels and jewelry, fabulous red lipstick, or a sparkly belt - she always got dressed, and sometimes even dressed up!  Throw on a scarf, put on some lip gloss and you are ready to take on the world. You’ll look great, and more importantly, you’ll feel great when you dress up.  That little boost of confidence can go a long way! 

You have so much on your mind right now, that it's important to weed out the negativity. Please promise your friends at Fighting Pretty that you will avoid cancer-related information on the internet (unless it’s a self-help book or movie) and surround yourself with people who will encourage you and stick by your side through this fight.  Do something that makes you happy! Instead of watching sad, sappy movies, put on Bride Wars, Devil Wears Prada, It's Complicated, whatever! Just surround yourself with positivity. If you're not into movies, get outside for some fresh air, take up knitting or get working on a crossword puzzle. Just be sure to engage in an activity that boosts your spirits and takes your mind off cancer for a while. 

Sometimes walking into the support group can be intimidating, and nerve wracking. Who wants to share their sob story? It's hard! But one of the best things you can do is find people that can talk you through this, especially those who can say, “Been there, done that!” Confiding in others will help you keep a positive perspective, but both positive and negative attitudes are important.  Positive ones will show you how many fellow women have followed this same path and fought through, while negative ones reassure you that your feelings are normal and common.  We have some great resources for you if you can't find a support group close by. Check out:

Breast Friends

Pink Lemonade Project

American Cancer Society

Dr. Shani Fox

"Never underestimate the healing power of listening to your favorite music on full blast while dancing around your house like an idiot." 

Kara Dolce and her mom Maryann were watching a movie one night, and the song "Crazy" came on by Alanis Moorisette (Seal remake). Kara was knee-deep in chemotherapy treatments and they were having a mom/daughter night watching movies and eating popcorn trying not to think about cancer. When this song came on, something struck them both! "You're never gonna survive, unless you get a little CRAZY!" The two of them started laughing, crying, jumping, and hugging! This was their Power Song together! This gave them both strength to keep on fighting this fight! 

Kara had other songs too, and even now, six years out of treatment, there are songs that resonate to always keep Fighting Pretty. So make a playlist on your iPhone and whenever you're feeling a little down, put them on, jump around and dance around your living room like an idiot! 

Here are some great ones:

• "Shine Bright Like a Diamond" Rihanna
• "Can't Hold Us" Macklemore and Ryan
• "Stronger" Kanye West
• "Undeniable" Mat Kearney
• "Roar" Katy Perry
• "Brave" Sara Bareilles
• "Good Life" One Republic

Celebrate everything! Maybe you finished another round of chemo and are that much closer to being done, your hair is coming back, or you just got good results on your PTScan. Anything positive happening during this time is great.  Even if you have a ways to go, remember how far you’ve come. 

And finally, don’t forget that even through all of this, you are still YOU!  Having cancer doesn’t make you just another “cancer patient.” It simply adds character to the wonderful being that is you. Over here at Fighting Pretty we try to remind all of you of this, especially through Pretty Packages. We want you to remember that who you are won’t change throughout the cancer; you’re still beautiful and you’re still you.  

We hope this guide to Fighting Pretty will encourage and inspire you to give all you’ve got to this fight and to do it with style and poise!  Don’t forget that you are strong and you are beautiful.

To request a Pretty Package or make a donation, visit our site at www.fightingpretty.org and be sure to find us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to keep up with all things Fighting Pretty!

You can break down a woman temporarily...but she will come back stronger than ever

“You can break down a woman temporarily, but a real woman will always pick up the pieces, rebuild herself, and come back stronger than ever.”

These are words that Jackie Leahy would remind herself as she battled Stage 2 breast cancer at age 34. Jackie had a strength that couldn’t go unnoticed. When she spoke of her diagnosis and her journey, she spoke with a softness in her voice, like this was something she conquered and with ease.

Though it might not have been easy, she looked to her 10 month old daughter as her inspiration. She had to fight for her family, for her baby and for herself. Experiencing breast cancer at such a young age, with so much going on in her life, took Jackie by storm. Like anyone, she didn’t feel beautiful and didn’t feel like herself. But after wearing wigs and fussing with her new look for hours on end, she eventually said “f*** it!” and wrapped a colorful scarf around her head full of peach fuzz and added big fabulous earrings. It was that turning point in her journey, where she took hold of this cancer journey and was truly “Fighting Pretty.” 

Jackie just recently celebrated being done with treatment for two years, and is ready to start the next chapter of her life. And even better, has a baby on the way!  She’s not finding out the sex prior to birth because Jackie and her husband appreciate happy surprises more now than ever before.

This month, we honor Jackie, our March Fighting Pretty icon for her inner strength, her outer beauty and her fabulous drive to beat cancer with a smile on her face, a baby in her arms and big earrings on her ears!

“Life is good,” says Jackie. And we agree! Keep on Fighting Pretty!

Photo credit: William Philbin

Dr. Shani: You May Have Cancer, But Cancer Doesn’t Have You

Going through cancer treatment can be a blur and a whirlwind process.   You may feel that you’re getting funneled from one treatment to the next, with no time to stop and process what is actually going on, and with no time for yourself!   Local Portland, Oregon area doctor Shani Fox has made it her mission to change this typical process.  Unlike traditional doctors, Dr. Shani takes care of you holistically.  She practices naturopathic medicine in order to fix the root cause, not just bandage the symptoms.  For example, an oncologist will take care of a tumor, while Dr. Shani will take care of the rest of the person during treatment – physically and emotionally. 

As a naturopathic doctor, she looks past traditional treatment and wants to heal the whole person.   Each person has a different individual experience while undergoing treatment, so she looks for ways to properly nourish each patient to get sufficient nutrients based on the situation.  She also looks for ways to increase energy and help you recover while finding ways to prevent future cancer so you don’t have to go through this experience again.  Dr. Shani really is a doctor for the body, mind, and spirit. 

After meeting Dr. Shani over coffee at a local pancake house in SE Portland, she was dressed in her Barre3 gear and out and about on a Sunday morning. Yet despite her welcoming and casual attire, she was extremely professional, motivating and inspirational. Her knowledge of how to treat your body while experiencing such a traumatic journey was something that I gravitated toward immediately. 

She spoke of topics that us cancer survivors think about frequently – Is soy ok for you? What kind of exercise should I be doing? Any vitamins that I should take? Am I making the right health choices? And so much more.

Dr. Shani’s mission is to put you back in control of your life during cancer treatment, which is so incredibly important.  There is a weird thing that happens when you go for your last chemo or radiation treatment and you feel – “It’s done (thank God!)…I’m so happy, but now what? How do I keep fighting this to make sure it doesn’t come back?”

When asked to provide some words of wisdom to patients, Dr. Shani emphasized the fact that “you may have cancer, but cancer doesn’t have you.”  In order to regain control during this hectic time, you have to believe in that statement and believe in a healthy future after cancer.  In believing that there is life beyond this roadblock, you can put yourself back in control of your wellness. 

We’d like to thank Dr. Shani Fox for her incredible inspiration to women fighting pretty everywhere and for showing them that they do have options to consider during their treatment.   We encourage you all to learn more about Dr. Shani’s practice, watch her video or get in contact with her, by visiting her website: www.drshanifox.com.